The Power of Fit: Why I Sometimes Say “No” - and Why It Matters

In real estate, relationships matter just as much as results. Over the years, I’ve learned that success isn’t just about closing deals or collecting commission checks, it’s about alignment, trust, and respect between agent and client.

That’s why, every now and then, I make a decision that surprises people: I say no to working with someone.

Not because I don’t care or because I’m too busy (though January is famously hectic). It’s because I’ve learned that “fit” - the chemistry, communication style, and shared expectations between agent and client - is the single most important factor in whether we’ll have a successful, stress-free experience together. I work incredibly hard for my clients and give each one my full attention, but because my time and energy are finite, if one relationship is constantly draining that energy, it ultimately takes away from the level of service and focus all my clients deserve, and that’s simply not worth it in the bigger picture.

Why Fit Matters So Much

Buying or selling a home is one of the most personal financial decisions a person can make. It’s emotional, complex, and deeply tied to someone’s lifestyle, family, and future. The agent you choose becomes your partner, not just your representative.

If our communication styles clash, if our values aren’t aligned, or if one of us doesn’t trust the other’s process, it can lead to unnecessary frustration and disappointment.

A good fit means:

• We communicate openly and respectfully.

• We trust each other’s expertise.

• We share a common goal and timeline.

• We both understand what success looks like.

When those things line up, magic happens. The process feels smooth, decisions come easier, and we often end up celebrating not just a sale, but a friendship.

How to Assess Fit (For Both Sides)

Fit isn’t one-sided. It’s something both client and agent should evaluate early on. Here are a few things I look for (and recommend clients look for too):

• Trust level: Do they believe in my process, pricing, marketing, negotiation strategy, or does every recommendation turn into a debate? Mutual trust is essential.

• Realistic expectations: I can’t make a market bend to meet a wish price, and I’m honest about that. Clients who value truth over flattery tend to have the best experiences.

• Respect for time and boundaries: I pour myself into this business, but healthy boundaries help me bring my best energy to every client.

• Personality fit: Over the years, I’ve had the privilege of working with just about every personality type imaginable - the analytical thinkers who thrive on data, the big-picture visionaries who want to focus on lifestyle, the decisive doers, and the thoughtful deliberators. My corporate background and years in real estate have taught me how to adapt, communicate, and connect with all kinds of people. But even with that versatility, there’s one non-negotiable: mutual respect. If someone is consistently rude, negative, dismissive, or unkind, no level of skill or experience can make that partnership healthy or productive.

Red Flags That Signal a Poor Fit

Sometimes, despite the best intentions, there are early signs that a working relationship might not be ideal. Over time, I’ve learned to trust my instincts when something feels “off.” Those gut feelings usually stem from subtle, and sometimes not-so-subtle, cues that tell me the relationship may not be grounded in mutual trust and respect.

There have been a few times in my career when I’ve felt that quiet nudge in my gut and chose to ignore it. Sometimes it was because the red flags were subtle or didn’t show up right away; other times, it was because I wanted so badly to help that I gave the situation the benefit of the doubt. But almost every single time I’ve ignored that instinct, I’ve regretted it. By the time the concerns surfaced fully, I was already deeply invested - emotionally, financially, and professionally. Although the client was pleased with the experience, it ended up costing me far more than if I had simply trusted my intuition and moved on earlier. Experience has taught me that those gut feelings are rarely wrong.

Here are a few red flags I’ve learned to recognize:

• Shopping for the lowest commission rather than the right partnership: The client interviews multiple agents but seems to be “shopping” purely for the lowest commission, not the highest value. I fully understand that real estate is a significant financial decision, and every dollar matters. But when there is more focus is on cutting commission instead of maximizing value, it signals that we may not share the same priorities. My clients hire me not because I’m the cheapest, but because I deliver exceptional results through expertise, strategy, and hard work - and that value goes far beyond a percentage point. If your company was looking for ways to “save money,” would you be okay if they came to you and asked you to take a pay cut for the valuable work you do? Of course not. You’d recognize that your time, skill, and experience are worth fair compensation. The same principle applies here - great service, proven results, and professional dedication come with fair value attached.

  
  

• Resistance to data and market realities: I base my recommendations on facts, trends, and decades of experience - not wishful thinking. When a client insists on ignoring data or even debating every bit of feedback from the potential buyers (if they are a seller), it can lead to frustration and missed opportunities. I’m always open to discussion, but if every statistic becomes a battle, it’s a sign that we’re not operating from a shared sense of trust or realism.

  
  

• Disrespectful behavior or disregard for time: Whether it’s a pattern of missed appointments, repeated last-minute cancellations or requests, or an unkind tone in communication, those behaviors add up. I work extremely hard for my clients and structure my schedule to give each one the time and focus they deserve. Disrespecting that balance not only strains our working relationship but can also take away from other clients who value that commitment.

  
  

• Unrealistic expectations for availability: I pride myself on being responsive and hands-on, but real estate isn’t a 24/7 emergency hotline. When someone expects constant access or instant answers at all hours, it’s often a sign of deeper trust or control issues. Setting clear boundaries from the start ensures I can provide excellent service while maintaining the focus and energy needed to deliver great results.

  
  

• Lack of trust from the outset: Healthy collaboration requires a foundation of trust. If a client questions every detail, second-guesses every recommendation, or assumes bad intent before we even begin, it makes it nearly impossible to build the kind of partnership that produces great outcomes. Real estate is a team effort - not a tug-of-war. When someone behaves as if we’re on opposing sides or withholds critical information needed to do my job effectively, it undermines the process and limits what I can accomplish on their behalf. The best results happen when we work together transparently, each doing our part toward a shared goal.

These red flags are not about ego or preference - they’re about maintaining the integrity of the process. My goal is always to create a positive, productive experience where my clients feel supported, informed, and empowered. When mutual respect or trust is missing, that dynamic simply can’t thrive. I’ve learned that walking away from a poor fit early on protects not only my time and energy but also the client’s opportunity to find someone who may be a better match for their personality and expectations.

Ultimately, the best real estate experiences come from partnerships rooted in trust, communication, and respect - not tension and friction. Saying “no” to the wrong fit allows me to say an enthusiastic “yes” to the clients I can truly serve at the highest level.

Saying “No” — With Care

Turning someone away is never easy. It’s something I think about carefully, often for days. I genuinely enjoy helping people, and I take pride in guiding clients through one of life’s biggest milestones.But part of professionalism is knowing when to step back gracefully and give someone the opportunity to find a better match.

When that happens, I always communicate it with kindness and clarity. I thank them for their time, express appreciation for the connection, and explain that, based on our conversations or expectations, I just don’t feel I’m the best fit to serve them in the way they deserve. It’s not rejection, it’s respect. Because every client deserves an agent who feels fully aligned with their goals, and every agent deserves clients who trust their expertise.

Defining How I Allow Myself to Be Treated

At the heart of this philosophy is a simple truth: we teach people how to treat us. In business, just like in life, allowing disrespect, constant skepticism, or crossed boundaries sets a precedent that erodes professionalism and joy. By being intentional about who I work with - and how I work - I protect my ability to show up 100% for those who value the relationship, trust the process, and share mutual respect. This approach has allowed me to deliver consistently exceptional experiences for my clients. It’s also why many of them become lifelong friends long after the closing table.

Real estate is a relationship business, not a transactional one. The best results happen when both client and agent feel valued, understood, and in sync. So if you’re looking for an agent, I encourage you to think about fit just as much as experience or commission. Ask yourself: Does this person listen? Do they understand my goals? Do I trust their judgment? And if you’re an agent, remember - saying “no” sometimes is one of the most powerful ways to say “yes” to the right clients, the right energy, and the right kind of success.

If you are considering buying or selling a home in Naples and surrounding areas and you aren’t satisified with average services, you will want to contact Your Naples Real Estate Expert, Renee Hahn, to ensure you get the service, attention and outcomes you deserve.

Renee Hahn, Ranked in the top 0.5% in the Nation

📍Naples, Florida

📞(239) 287-2576

🌐 www.YourNaplesExpert.com

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